Our first Winter

As most of you know, this is our first Winter in St. Louis - well, our first Winter anywhere that has a real Winter. We've lived in cold places with low temperatures but we have never dealt with snow that doesn't dissolve shortly after falling. We keep being asked: What do we think?

Well, what we think is Winter is not our favorite season physically or financially. It's so fun to watch the snow fall and accumulate. It is beautiful to see as it settles on the tree branches and over the hills. Now, I say this from the perspective of the heated car window or more especially from my window at our apartment. It isn't fun YET brushing off the car (well, ask Luba) or sliding driving in it. I slid a couple times on the last drive. I've never had such tightly clenched body parts and white knuckles before.

First of all, we are grossly under-dressed. Due to getting back on our feet financially after a cross country move and the fact that I'm always under-dressed in cool/cold temperatures, we have not yet grown our winter wardrobe and supplies. We have coats to get us by and we will definitely be prepared next year (remind me to read this sentence next year to see if I'm laughing or crying uncontrollably). Luba has been his more-than-awesome self as usual. After a snowfall, he brushes off my car before he leaves for work even on those days I go in much later and have more time.

Luckily, it has been a very mild Winter. High five, God, you know we can only handle smaller increments in change and temperature. We are weak mortals. It has only really affected us on 2 workdays so that's pretty minimal.

The nice thing is that everyone understands it and appreciates getting off the road and settled in somewhere when you can, or when you suck at driving in snow. It has been a forced slow pace, which has been nice. It was great timing for our Whole30 because we weren't tempted by sunny outside patios at breweries or picnics in the park with cheeses & meats!

I constantly remind myself of thoughts shared in the post, Seasons. How I'll appreciate that Spring! Come on now, Spring, so that I can fully appreciate you.

I'll post some pictures below from our new Winter Wonderland.

Stay warm,

Danielle

 first time behind the wheel

 

 Bless him - he's the sweetest

 

Seasons

Hello from a beautiful Fall day in St. Louis!

I have been in “puppy love” with Fall here. It has always been my favorite season but I’ve never experienced it so fully as I have here in our first year in St. Louis. The trees are beautiful. So many times I have pulled over to take a picture. I often just swipe through my photos looking at the gallery of trees I’ve captured. The crisp cool breezes are romantic and invigorating. We are surrounded by beauty- we need not look too hard to find it. We are captivated by the colors we see at only this time of year. How many shades of golden? Orange? I had never seen these shades.

One reason I was excited to move here was to experience true seasons.  Recognizing that Winter would be difficult I knew the other seasons would be so much more appreciated and anticipated. In California, it’s hard to complain about year-round sunshine, but for me, it was not healthy. I needed the sights, sounds, feelings, and social experiences of all four seasons. Seasons are a physical tangible reminder of the cycles and seasons of life. Walking outdoors or through the park can be as good a sermon as Sunday morning.

Just look at these pictures: 

I love Fall most but I feel like when we are in a “Fall” in our lives, we know to cherish it. We know it can change any time. We recognize that we are living in the “good days,” and odds are that they can only last so long before we are faced with a challenge. Slowly we see the signs that the year (of our lives) is changing. Fall teases me with the hardest of seasons for me – Winter. The beloved leaves are falling from the trees in greater numbers. You can now see the bare branches instead of the full kaleidoscope of red, orange, brown and golden leaves. The air is more biting in the mornings and evenings. Ice begins to form early in the mornings providing us with warnings. There's a sense of preparedness. One day, we wake up and ask, “Where did it go?” although we know the answer already. we hope that we had acknowledged the subtleties and seized the opportunities before the next season comes.  

Winter often too closely follows Fall. It will come, there's no doubt. Winter is when we bunker up. We store up and we bustle less. We cling to each other to keep warm. We spend more time at home. We look for comfort. Flavors become warm and spicy. There’s a feeling of heaviness. The world outside can be bitter and harsh. There can be scarcity. There’s death. Maybe we barely get by. We question if we will survive this season. We have to reorient to what is important. We have to look more closely and longer to find beauty. We have to look for a “different” kind of beauty in this season. We don’t like it but it’s necessary, necessary for life and regrowth.

I need not go into detail as it is not my story, but Winter hit our family. I had been basking in my Fall (literally and spiritually). But, I knew. I felt Winter whispering. I felt tinges of cold blow through my soul. And then it came. So, just like the season, the family has bunkered up. We’ve stored up plans, love, and swords of scripture. We cling to togetherness, the essentials, and the bottom line. It’s harsh and bitter, but we know that as the seasons have beautifully taught us, Spring will come. On the other side of Winter is newness, vibrancy, life, growth. We will be renewed and refreshed, and we will never be the same as we were. As hard as it can be and will be, we take hope in Spring because we know that it is around the corner.

John Steinbeck said, "What good is the warmth of summer, without the cold of winter to give it sweetness.”

Each season has so much to teach us, if we will watch.

So, loves, enjoy the season that you are in if you are in a sweet one. If you find yourself in Winter, hold on. Though it may not feel soon enough, Spring will come.

Love,

Danielle

To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:

A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted;

A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up;

A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;

 A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;

A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away;

A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;

A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace.

He hath made everything beautiful in his time: also he hath set the world in their heart, so that no man can find out the work that God maketh from the beginning to the end.

Ecclesiastes 3: 1-8, 11 (King James Version)

Hey, hey! Time for an update!

Well, hello there! It has been a while, hasn’t it?

We’ve both been busy settling in to “the Lou” and finding our rhythms…..I thought an update was long overdue!

I’ve so missed this blog. I do not want to get back to the “single, party of 1” lonelier days but man did I have some serious time to think, think, think, and write, write, write. It was good for the soul. That’s one soul-care activity I desperately need to find time for again. We absolutely have to find time to lead ourselves and care for what we need to thrive. Right? Right!

As for me, I’ve been getting busier at Easter Seals Midwest. It has been a nice slow start building a case load and learning the ropes. I’ve done several evaluations and starting to provide some therapy. I’ve made several mistakes. Why do we initially go to “Maybe I’m not good enough” or “people are going to think poorly of me” when we make a simple expected mistake. I’m learning through this learning curve to be gentle and to extend grace inward. Starting over is hard. I’m so used to being “a big fish in a little pond” in terms of knowing things about work and having all the answers to feeling like a “drowning minnow” sometimes. I’m reminding myself to really feel this process and to appreciate the experience. Don’t get me wrong- I love the placement. I left a great group of co-workers back in California, but I was also welcomed in by a great group of co-workers. I’m appreciative every day of the professionalism, friendliness and knowledge of my fellow BCBAs. The rest of the staff is great too and truly care for the success of the clients. Another new part of this process for me is evaluating older clients (hence the steep learning curve). I’m assessing two clients now – both of them are in their late 20s.

As for Luba, he started a new job on July 1!! WOOT! It couldn’t be more perfect for him. He is working at the International Institute. It’s an agency that assists immigrants and refugees. It especially warms my heart as I had the chance to experience what this country offers refugees back in 2011 when I served CreateCommon Good in Boise, Idaho. So far, so good – he loves it. I’m so happy that he has been able to find a non-profit and one where he can connect uniquely with the ones served by it. We had learned about this organization by two different people in the same weekend (they didn’t know each other) so he hopped on to the website and found that they were hiring. 

As for us, we have been able to celebrate 3 birthdays so far! Finally, in one city! My birthday was in June and my sister and Luba celebrated July birthdays within a couple days of one another.  Two things: 1) you can tell who the photographer in the family is, and 2) I love cakes for birthdays. I did pick out a cannoli (with an appropriate candle) for myself but I love cakes for others. I believe everyone should have a birthday cake (or pie or whatever) for a birthday, with cheesy writing!

We have had two visitors since we moved. Jody visited us in May and the Diaz (April) family stopped in for a night during their move to Indiana. 

In June, I went back to LA for the GodChicks Conference. I go every year and its the single biggest event that feeds my soul. I take home so many nuggets of wisdom that I go back to throughout the year and years beyond. This year, I saw Joyce Meyer, Christine Caine, Holly Wagner, and Rich & DawnChere Wilkerson. I've already bought my ticket for 2016 - along with fave girlfriends. It was so great to reunite with friends- ones that went to the conference with me are my prayer posse. After the conference that Saturday night, I was able to meet up with my closest girlfriends for dinner.

 Joyce Meyer - going strong in her 70s!

 Can you believe I had written this in my journal one year earlier, at the same conference - this is the message I kept hearing all weekend whispered to me....it was true! 

 DawnChere Wilkerson

 Rich Wilkerson - I forgive you for befriending Kanye West

one of the best messages I have ever heard

 lunch with some of the strongest & bravest women I know

 Christine Caine

The conference was at the Dolby....the DOLBY! The Academy Awards are held at the Dolby Theater in the heart of Hollywood. No gold idols on this stage this weekend!

Socially, we are making some connections. Luba has met some South Africans and we’ve had a couple of dinners/lunches and plan to see them again. It’s nice to connect with South Africans for him and I get to live vicariously. Hearing them speak in Afrikaans takes me back to days in South Africa. They are the friendliest of people. 

A braai, in America!

We’ve been to 2 Cardinals games already. It’s so fun here! The ins & outs are so easy and it’s like a whole community there around the ballpark. There is not “right in for the game and right out after” like I’m used to. I’m learning about this whole “Cardinal Nation” business. And its serious business too. We went to games coincidentally that were against California teams – the Dodgers and the Padres.

I started a book club on meetup.com so that I could meet some gals that like to read and come from a variety of backgrounds. I had great luck in CA with meeting friends that way. I’ve met some really cool women so far. One of them had also gone through the same visa process as me so we hit it off immediately. What a strong connection we make through hardship, right? You cling to those who “get it.”

I'm looking for a new ENT so that I can get a check up this year. I had my thyroid checked as a routine ultrasound since I have 3 nodules living there...no big deal for now, but we will watch them. (yes, this is separate from my "neck testicle" I had removed) I met with the doctor for the results. None were found. What? Where in the hell are they? Oh well, still nothing to worry about. But, sitting across from this computer/desk is an all too familiar scene. 

It took me back to 2013, the beginning of my journey with the tumor I had removed. Each glance reminds me of life, of love, of tenacity, of faith, of healing. The list goes on. And to hear another physician say "You had that removed with NO damage whatsoever? No effects? It makes me giggle inside. It makes a warmth wash over me and I look above. I just bet God winked. No, I bet he got up off that throne and WOOPED or fist pumped (or some move we haven't learned yet but will be popular in a few years because he knows everything!)! A spiritual bond grew during that season that is indescribable. I need those moments because I forget sometimes that it even happened - what a recovery! I don't take one single moment for granted though as I'm able to continue on working and use my voice. 

I’m also unveiling a new project soon – a business. I’ll save the details for another post but it’s something I’ve always dreamed of but never thought I was ready for. So after some thinking, I figured WHY NOT! For now, I can dip my toes in the water to see how it goes and it gives me the chance to take care of myself (providing speech, extra cash) and see where this goes. I’ll never know if I don’t try, right? If I don’t believe in me, then no one will.  To be continued but here's a look at a business owner!

That’s about it for us for now. Keep in touch - we miss you!

Love,

Danielle (& Luba)

St. Louis or Bust: Road Trip Day 5 (last day!)

Day 5 (April 30) of this road trip!

Last day of driving!

We woke up in OKC in our fancy hotel. Aaaaaaah! So nice!

We decide to just bust it straight to St. Louis. I’m over this driving. We woke up, grabbed Starbucks (yes, finally a Starbucks around – not that it’s great coffee but it reminds me of civilization as I know it)

We made only one Roadside America suggested stop – Pop’s Soda Ranch. It’s like a quick stop filled with hundreds of unique  (and regular) sodas. There were flavors like bacon and buffalo chicken wings. 

And then….we drove. And drove. And drove.

Seven hours and some minutes later…..we are having dinner in St. Louis with my sister. At her house. At her table. With the family. We’ve made it.

Love, Danielle

St. Louis or Bust: Road Trip Day 1

I wanted to blog our road trip so I am going to do it per day to include stops and hotel stays.

Overall, planning this trip was SO SO SO easy. I used the Roadtrippers app. I entered the destination (STL) and then dropped in places I wanted to see along the way. It automatically adds stops to your timeline according to location on the drive. It also gives you a map with your stops numbered and in between it provides mileage and time expectancy. I also added dates so I could keep up with our agenda. This was a lifesaver in terms of stress and having to plan out the route. I also used Roadside America, the app, as we drove. In each town, I used location services to search for sites to see around us. If they seemed quirky and/or fun, then we stopped. Users rate the sites in terms of boring, must stop, major fun, etc. It also gives directions, tips, and how far off the interstate it is. Those two apps planned our trip for us and were fantastic. I highly recommend both!

To avoid such a long drive on day 1 and to maximize time, we stayed in Barstow on April 25, after our going away party. We drove about 2-2.5 hours to get ahead of schedule. We also stayed at the Super 8, my first time (and last) at a Super 8. There are not many options in Barstow and I sure didn’t want to spend good money on a hotel in a place we wouldn’t enjoy but only sleep for a short time before heading out early. We were so tired (and emotionally overwhelmed) that when I walked in that night I thought, “This isn’t so bad!” The room overall was good with everything that you need. When we woke up, we both said, “This is gross. Let’s get outta here.” Luba thought we smelled like the room. Funny how perspective changes after rest! What got me was AFTER I finished showering, I saw a booger on the shower curtain. I immediately started gagging and almost vomited. My gag reflex is so sensitive since my surgery and one gross thought can send me running to the toilet. I threw on clothes and away we went!! That was a sign that adventure awaits?

Our first destination was Oatman, Arizona which I kept referring to as Donkey Town. I had seen my friend Heather’s (@diningwithdisney) pictures and knew it was a quirky place I needed to see. It was a 3-hour drive to Oatman from Barstow. We walked around the town and had a great time seeing all of the shops, grabbing photo opps, and watching/yielding to the burros. Yes, burros wander the streets. At most stores, you can buy feed (it looked like a block of marijuana). I couldn’t leave without buying some and feeding the burros so that was my last stop. It started out fun until I was swarmed and surrounded by burros. Experience complete – time to move on out of “Donkey Town.”

We headed out back the way we came instead of driving forward through Route 66 to avoid extra hills and miles. We filled up the tank and headed on to the next destination, Seligman, 2 hours away. We might have been low on gas because of misunderstanding of what "ghost town" means (as in no working gas stations, not a town with ghosts). 

The next stop was Delgadillo’sSnow Cap Drive-in, a find from Roadside America and Roadtrippers. I loved this stop! It was so much fun. It’s a simple drive-in with all sorts of “stuff” out back to look through as well as old cars (like Cars the movie). We ordered basic burgers. The staff is very funny and they play jokes on patrons like asking if you want ketchup on your burger and then squirting the bottle at you that has a red string that pops out on you. The doors say pull on one side, but the pull is actually on the other side so it takes everyone a second to realize what is going on. It didn’t outsmart me though, I just started doing the opposite of what it said. Pffffft. Simple jokes, fun laughs.

After running around and taking some pix in the town, we headed to Bearizona (another @diningindisney recommendation). It was 40 minutes away in Williams. This place, people, is a must stop if passing through! Kids would LOVE it. It’s a park that allows you to drive your car through and look at the animals. We saw wolves, different kinds of bears, and bison. There is also a walk-through part as well. There were also bear cubs to see. Oh! During our drive, we also saw some bear cubs “in the making” as you’ll notice in one of the pictures.

We ended the day in Williams. We stayed at a B & B type hotel, the Grand Canyon Hotel. It’s an old quaint hotel that resembles a B & B or hostel. It felt like staying at someone’s house, in a guest bedroom. The room had an old dresser, and the bed had a teddy bear on it and it felt like Luba was sneaking over into my bedroom. Ok, enough of that. We had dinner at Red Raven, which was next door. We toasted a fabulous first day, a new adventure, and our 1-year anniversary with some bubbly.

Day 2 coming soon!

Danielle

P.S. I’ll also be posting reviews on Trip Advisor and Yelp of all the sites, restaurants and hotels