Food for the mind, soul, and "innerds"

I come from the South. I mean, waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay down deep in the South in the bottom of Mississippi from a town that I can bet you have never heard of. I am very proud of my "Southernness." While we get a bad rap for a few a lot of things, we do many well. One of those is hospitality. We love cooking. We love talking. We love hosting. We love talking. We love story telling into the wee hours of the night. I definitely have this in me.

For a little over a year, my girlfriends and I have gathered once monthly to cook and eat together. We all cherish this monthly occasion. Each month, someone different hosts the night at her house. We all show up to discover the theme and we are all assigned to a "station." Together, we cook an array of recipes that we may never otherwise try on our own. When everything is ready, we sit down together at the table and eat. I love the conversation over the stirring and chopping, the laughter as we "amend" the recipe with extra butter or spice, and the learning as we teach each other certain culinary skills. It's intimate and beautiful. We love and we learn.

For the longest time, I hosted parties all the time. Then as I grew older and most of my friends began to buy their own houses, I began to shy away from having people over. Lately, this has been on my mind with the "push" to do community together at my church. For a few years, I've said that I want a modest [or small even] house "one day" that is just right for hosting. I've yearned for it. So much hinged on the future dwelling. Everything can be small except one space where I can squeeze people in for meals, games, conversation, etc. As I've begun thinking of what is missing lately, it dawned on me that it is hosting. I've been waiting for a "one day house." I have been sometimes embarrassed of the lack of my own place compared to friends [the joys of being in your 30s and single in a place with overpriced real estate]. Maybe I felt that marrieds didn't want to spend a Saturday night with the singles? Really though, I've just been missing opportunities for community. For what?!

As this was on my mind, I ran across this book called "Bread and Wine" on a few bloggers' sites. I googled amazon-ed it, and this is the description:

As a follow up to her two bestselling books, Bittersweet and Cold Tangerines, author and blogger Shauna Niequist returns with the perfect read for those who love food and value the community and connection of family and friends around the table. Bread and Wine is a collection of essays about family relationships, friendships, and the meals that bring us together. This mix of Anne Lamott and Barefoot Contessa is a funny, honest, and vulnerable spiritual memoir. Bread and Wine is a celebration of food shared, reminding readers of the joy found in a life around the table. It's about the ways God teaches and nourishes people as they nourish the people around them. It's about hunger, both physical and otherwise, and the connections between the two. With wonderful recipes included, from Bacon-Wrapped Dates to Mango Chicken Curry to Blueberry Crisp, readers will be able to recreate the comforting and satisfying meals that come to life in Bread and Wine.

This is what Amazon states is inside the flap:

This is what I want you to do: tell someone you love them, and that dinner's at six.

Bread & Wine is a collection of stories about life around the table--about family, friend- ships, and the meals that bring us together. It's about Bacon-Wrapped Dates and Mango Chicken Curry and Blueberry Crisp. It's about the ways God teaches and nourishes us as we nourish the people around us. It's about recipes, entertaining ideas, and meals to share with friends and family, made by hand and with love.

Many of the most sacred moments in my life, the ones in which I feel God's presence most profoundly, when I feel the goodness of the world most arrestingly, take place around the table. Something extraordinary happens when we slow down, open our homes, look into one anothers' faces, and listen to one another's stories around the table.

This is my love letter to life around the table.  

 

I decided to order the book for my own consumption. Then it hit me. HOST. I know the Bible has many scriptures related to "breaking bread" together within community. Dining together was/is intimate and important.  I sensed the urging to host and share this book and experience. It doesn't matter the surroundings, a rented home or owned. The table setting need not be perfect. The dishes do not all have to match. The serving ware does not have to be top notch. Plasticware could even be used [gasp!].  The point is to gather friends AND acquaintances--no matter the age or life stage. Set up stations for cooking, learning, and laughing.  Create. Dine together. Talk about the book and whatever topics the chapters lend. Love one another.

So, I'm doing it. All I needed was the gentle urge in my spirit. I've learned that those urges lead me into uncharted territory full of adventure and depth. I'm in the processing of figuring out the "who." The "what" is to spend 4 months, meeting one time per month, cooking, eating, and talking together where I live. Eating on my mismatched plates if need be. Drinking [Trader Joe's?] wine from Target wine glasses. Hosting even if it's "messy." I'm too excited for the possibilities not to.

But, the question is: Will YOU?

Go check out buy Bread and Wine NOW!

The Church as a Mother

Recently, I was flipping through my journal and came across this picture....

Today, I came to mind so I flipped back to look at it. I'm not sure when I wrote this or why, or if a post was in the works in my soul, but it's there from maybe 6 months ago. As I thought of mothers today, both my own and those who have served as a mother to me in some capacity, I thought of NewSong as a mother.

The sentence is true: I LOVE this church, and by church, I mean the people, my community.

Like a mother, it has pushed me to be more than I thought I could be. I remember the first day I walked in to this church. I was timid. I barely spoke. I stuck out like a sore thumb (less white people circa 2003). I sat on the back row. I felt shame having been out of church and deep in sin for a long time. I loved my first time and have hardly missed a Sunday since. It was exactly what I had dreamed of when I was younger but had given up in finding. This church embraced me. It wiped away the fear, tears, shame and other emotions that had been bottled up inside and comforted me, just like my mother would have done. While it hoped for more from me, it met me where I was. With encouragement and resources, it has shaped me to be who I am today and prepared me to be more that I have yet to realize or see unfold. It recognized me as a leader before I did and gave me opportunities to lead when I did not believe I had the tools or was the right fit. I've been gently reminded here of what I need to "do" or "change" to be more in tune with God without feeling condemnation. I've felt that no matter how much I screw up within or outside of the building, I'll be accepted and loved. And just like my real mama, I can say something about her but if YOU do, "them's fightin' words." 

Sometimes, I look around and am immediately teary-eyed seeing the extraordinary people that are part of this community--many I know personally and some whose stories I only know. I see my personal heroes in families that have adopted or fostered. I see the mother with children with disabilities who provides hope and encouragement for others. I see the physician who built an agency to help pregnant women with alternatives to abortions. I see pastors who are tangible and believe in the congregation as being priests. I see the group that visits Mexico monthly despite warnings to love and bring joy to the children in the orphanage. Everywhere, you can't move without bumping into Heaven on earth. You can't slip through the hallways without brushing up against one or many of God's hands and feet.

I'm surrounded by people who have walked hard roads, roads that are often avoided for an easier path, but they are transparent and vulnerable along their journeys. They share not only the ending, but the details of their struggles. People have bid farewell to that facade that is too often worn in churches. When I've had a dream that sometimes felt farfetched and out of my realm of ability, I've not heard "Let me know if you need help" but instead I have heard "You can do this! How can I help you?" For those that have said this, thank you. Your words have given me life.

If you are out there and looking for a church with an authentic community who isn't afraid to get messy with you in life's ups & downs, check us out. It doesn't matter how long you've been out of church, how many Saturday nights that you cap off with regret or shame, how deep in sin or despair you are, there is a place for you here. I know this, because there was a place for me. You can find more info here and here.

PS. My seat on the back row is available. I'm in the front.

Love, 

Danielle

Mission: Workplace

As many of you know, I work with children with special needs as a Speech-Language Pathologist to help them learn language and communicate. I work in a clinic alongside other disciplines (OT, PT, ABA) to provide services for the children and their families. I've been at my job for almost 9 years so I have a pretty good "handle" on how things run and can think quickly on my feet based on my experience. Recently, we have been going through changes learning new funding sources and responding to changes in laws; therefore, we have all been on a learning curve. I try to help out whenever and wherever I can. I grew up with parents who owned businesses so I saw that it takes a "family" to keep it going. It's hard work. It's so much more beyond what any employee sees. That perspective has really helped me in my professional career to see beyond my needs as an employee on to what I feel will help my employer, co-workers and families. 

Recently, someone asked a harmless question to another person: Why is Danielle doing so many extra things?

My immediate "repeatable" reaction:

WHAT!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!?!?!?!?!?

Then the following scrolled through my mind:

Is it not obvious the reason why?
It needs to get done.
It helps my boss who has become my mother away from home.
Because I'm able-bodied and can.
Because in the end, it somehow affects the families who I have been employed and "called" to serve.
Because I strive to do my best. Every day. In every situation.

I've thought of this one simple question for days.

Then I began to wonder....How do Christians view the workplace??

Church, to me, is like a fuel stop in my weekly journey. Sundays are rest days because they are easy days. I'm recharged and renewed on Sundays. I'm around others who think similarly to me, use the same lingo, etc. I live in a bubble on Sundays and I cherish it. It gives me strength. My soul overflows on Sunday.

The other 6 days of the week?? Tough. This is where ministry comes in. This is where I use the "fuel" from Sunday to charge though the rest of the week. The real test of faith to me is embedded deep in the trenches of my week, which is spent in the workplace.

People see God in me on Sundays. I'm energetic. I love to connect and have conversation. I serve in a visible ministry so people see me "doing" things. Do people see the God in me Monday through Saturday? Do people see God in you Monday through Saturday?

Granted, we ALL mess up. We have bad days. Your job is hard. My job is hard. It's emotional. It's exciting. It requires a ton of emotional energy. Sometimes I don't want to help someone when they need it because I just want to rest. I get tired of changing the toilet paper roll when someone else doesn't. I get it....but, perspective is key.

I believe we walk among angels and interface with them unknowingly, frequently. I believe that Jesus visits us at unexpected times through another person, in opportunities to serve "the least of these," those closest to his heart. In case you have not realized this, often the "least of these" are those that we typically would not readily approach or to whom we may not give a second glance. Personally, I do not believe Jesus chooses to "check up on me" in the form of a clean-shaven, well-dressed, middle-class person who is courteous and patient at all times when I'm well-rested, cheery, and oozing with my Southern hospitality. What would be the point in that?

Who are the "least of these" in your workplace? 

For me, it can be the families of children with autism or other disorder that come in emotional, with blood-shot eyes, tired, walking this journey of discovery and grief. There's often misplaced blame, anger, denial, gratitude, fear....all of which are manifested in a multitude of ways from person to person and circumstance to circumstance. Is it the parent to whom I have just given very delayed test scores? Is it the parent to whom I have just started the conversation of "Your child is not developing as a typical child and is showing signs of autism?"  Maybe it is my co-worker who made a sarcastic comment? Didn't finish a report? It's the children who have been entrusted in my care who are frustrated, may not speak with words but rather speak with behaviors (sometimes severe), and are looking to me for giving them a voice.

Can I grant all of the people with whom I interact the same amount of grace daily that I'm given continuously? Can I avoid keeping score and just do a menial task that is not "my job" because it needs to get done? Can you?

For me, it's all connected. All of the extra things I choose to do result in the families getting better care. Isn't that worth a few extra minutes to do something that I don't have to or that's not "my job?"

I know I have a very tangibly rewarding career. I see changes. I celebrate with families. Some of you may feel your job is mundane. Friend, it is not. It helps the rest of us do our jobs and do them well. You have a place, and your worth is tremendous. You must alter your perspective and see that. The insurance agent or coder who does not work directly with people may feel that the job is boring, mundane, unrewarding, but oh it is. Without his/her diligence, skill, and assistance, I cannot do mine.  The software engineer and computer technician? What would we do without you making our jobs run smoothly and efficiently? We are all connected.  We all have a job to do, and friend, God demands us to do it well.

"Surely, no matter what you are doing (speaking, writing, or working), do it all in the name of Jesus our Master, sending thanks to Him to God our Father."

Colossians 3:17 (the Voice)

"So no matter what your task is, work hard. Always do your best as the Lord's servant, not as man's." 

Colossians 3: 23 (the Voice)

Praying that you wake up energized and look forward to seeing new opportunities at your workplace tomorrow, 

Danielle