If you know me well, then you know I always tolerated Orange
County. It is very beautiful. It is very clean. I see why so many love the area.
The coastline alone reminds me of the beauty of creation and solidifies
knowledge of the existence of a Creator. The beaches are truly a gift. Being able
to stand on the edge allows one to inhale freshness and abundance and exhale freedom and vision. I miss being
able to access that already.
I most loved my early years in California when I lived in Hollywood.
I loved the hustle and bustle of the city. I loved the clean and I equally
loved the dirty. I loved the mix of cultures and the eclectic vibes that each culture
stamped on the neighborhood. It was my happy place. When I moved to Orange County, my passion for my
surroundings and my “in love” relationship with my city dwindled. I definitely worked
hard to find my place in the new area and to find “my places” and "my people." My church,
NewSong, and my work, Cornerstone, were my saviors. I lived in complacency in
an area that I didn’t love because I loved my people at both and I knew it was where I was supposed to be for the time-being.
Cornerstone really kept me in California for years. How can
someone’s work keep you that anchored when you work in a profession where you
can get a job anywhere in the world? There are three simple answers: the
coworkers, the children, and the families.
This was definitely one of my hardest goodbyes. Having been
there 10 years (almost 11 –in August), I was invested. I had grown there. I had
made my mark. I was comfortable and nicely situated in my professional career but
still with areas in which to grow. Much of my spiritual, personal and
professional growth occurred at this one location. I felt “set.” However, I
knew I needed to move and the urging only grew stronger. This was the piece of
the puzzle that was hardest to make fit in planning the move because the
good-bye was so hard.
Nina and Charlotte, the directors, truly love each employee
on staff. They love every child and every family member. Because you deal with
families who are travelling through any stage within the stages of grief, you
are met with any emotion at any given time, sometimes (and understandably) unexpected
explosions of anger and misguided arrows of blame. I had watched them treat
each with grace and love. Nina, who was my direct supervisor, has been my
second mother. At any time, I could [and did] go in to her office and ask her
to put on her “mother hat” or “boss hat” depending on the circumstance at hand.
Through her example of love and grace at work, I strived to be better –
spiritually, personally and professionally in management and work style. It is
rare that you find a mentor in your career [that is also your employer] that
can equally mentor you in all areas of your life. I can’t imagine being so far from
family for so long without her support and encouragement. She truly stepped in
as a mother each time I needed it and filled a huge gap far before it was recognized.
She hosted a lovely brunch before I left, and I relished each moment spent with
her sharing laughs and memories from over the years. So Nina, thank you.
I wanted to sign off this decade with a few words to the
groups that became my anchor.
To all of my
coworkers and “Cornerstone family:”
Thank you for making Cornerstone a wonderful experience. At times,
we drove each other crazy but everything was excusable because the love for the
children and desire to do what was best was apparent. I watch you speak with
parents, exuding grace and extending understanding for circumstances that you
do not understand. I’ve watched you speak softly to children who are crying,
and I have watched the most intense “snuggle therapy” sessions happen when scared
anxiety-ridden children are just learning to separate from parents. I have
watched you set boundaries, and with love, follow through. You are a model to
each child and the fruits of your labor often go unseen or unnoticed. They are
noticed though. I saw them. Parents see them, although they may not say it out
loud. The children feel it. You have worked in the margins, the trenches. You get
your hands dirty and you are open to learn. You are gifts and I am so lucky
that I got to witness these acts of love and sacrifices that you made every day.
Every. Single. Day.
You also surrounded me with love and care during my surgery
in September 2014. You made the whole process less scary. You swooped in like a
true family to bring goodies, meals, movies, books, and cards both before and
after my operation. You checked in until I came back to work, and you supported
me during my weeks back. You offered any assistance needed, and I know you
meant it. Those acts of service will never be forgotten.
Vania/Manuela/Jennifer: Although you do not provide therapy when performing office duties (Manuela: before ABA), we saw the love for the children. You got the brunt of all the "goings-on." You treated each parent so respectfully, even through unkind interactions. I have watched you love children while they are waiting for their parents who are running late. That tangible love, I know, kept them calm while they must have wondered why the parent was not there yet. You kept calm and kind despite being interrupted no less than 1, 334, 285 times in your day.
To Nina and Char, thank you for this business. Thank you for
coming to work every day and “keeping on keeping on” when it was not easy or
profitable. We never say it enough but we appreciate you and your efforts. Your
love for the employees and families is tremendous and sometimes we do not even
understand it. Thank you for being a mentor and treating us like sons and
daughters.
To the families:
Thank you for entrusting your children to my care. Thank you
for the trust that you showed in the early years when I was learning. When I didn’t
have the answers, you waited patiently for me to research and troubleshoot to
find them. At no time in between did you give up on me. We got there, as a
team. You have been so willing to let me try things, when you knew or felt it
wouldn’t work. Sometimes I was surprised and sometimes you were surprised in
the successes and/or failures. You allowed me to take your child who was
screaming and clinging to you. I know that was hard although you often just
waved “bye” with a smile. I know some of you went to your car and cried. You wondered
what in the world I was doing in there. You hoped I would offer a snack, give a hug when needed, wipe a tear, check for wet diapers, etc. Thank you for trusting.
Your courage in navigating through this world has inspired me.
You didn’t choose but were placed on an unexpected road and you navigated it
with bravery, hope, and grace. You helped me become a crusader for hope and to
fight unexpected circumstances with faith and with the tools I had in my hand
at the moment. Life isn’t fair, but you taught me to choose joy. You are fierce
in the fight and you stop at nothing for your children. You celebrate the small
steps as well as the milestones. Your ability to throw out “expectancies” and
laugh at them ignite my passion to grow more professionally and to be more
daring in my approaches. On a smaller scale, I’ve learned to say “screw this
milestone” and avoid comparing myself and “where I should be now” by watching you.
You have had to fight harder in your families and marriages.
Not only did you have the “usual” stress, but you also had the stress of
parenting a child who has different needs than others. It brings stress from
every which way – especially financially. I see you. We all see you. We understand
that it is hard although we cannot comprehend how hard. We stand with you. YOU are true superheroes.
To the children:
I do all of this for you. Thank you for giving me 10
exceptional years. Some of you I had in therapy since my first week in August
2004! You are a part of me. Watching you grow has been a gift. Thank you for
teaching me that I will always be a learner. No child is the same, even if the
diagnosis is the same. I have learned that a diagnosis means little outside of “technicalities.”
You are each so different. I have enjoyed celebrating your unique qualities. I have
laughed when you did what “you aren’t supposed to do yet” when I was focused on
“what you should be doing.” You are most often underestimated. I have learned
to focus on taking a step forward and celebrate small steps instead of focusing
on the next huge step because that’s really the key to enjoying life – just keep
walking forward. When you walk far enough, you meet the next big thing. If you
focus too much on the major events, then you miss all the intricacies of life.
I grew up to be so logical and live within parameters according
to circumstance- thank you for teaching me that there are no lines. Joy and
freedom lie outside the box. You slowly taught me to put one foot outside the
box until the point I was dancing around the box. You gave me back the
wonderment of play, a love of animals, and to openly discuss and work through
insecurities and inabilities because we all have them.
Turning the lights out in this room was excruciating as I closed a chapter filled with growth, joy, celebrations, closed door discussions, sharing of lives, LAUGHTER and commitments.
